Stay At Home Dad

I am a Husband, Father, Teacher, Pastor, Friend, Son,  Brother, and a few more words that describe who I am, but this sentence is just getting ridiculous to continue so I will just stop. You are welcome. Instead, I will share about where I am currently at in life and how people tend to disagree with it.


First, I am a stay at home dad. Yes, that's right. I watch the baby and make sure she is taken care of and occasionally I clean the house to my wife's standards...occasionally is the key word here. This choice was not an easy one for me at all. It was a role reversal in what I've been taught as a man and as a culture. Five years ago if you told me I would be a househusband (as Katie likes to call me) I would have told you "Uh..right." This transition has been a tough one due to the fact that a lot of men tie their self worth to what they do and not who they are. Simply I had fallen in the trap and forgot that as a man I was still providing financially to my family, as a man I was still providing emotionally to my family, as a man I was still providing spiritual leadership to my family. Who I am lies in a God bigger than men and titles.

So apparently I learned that if a man stays home to take care of his family there are a lot of stigmatization that come accompanied with the occupation. Here are a few of the following questions I get asked in no particular order.

1. What do you do? If you are a stay at home spouse I'm sure you heard this one before, but it's worse if you are a man. A lot of people assume you just sit around watching T.V or playing video games all day. As fun as that sounds that's not what happens! Ever tried to sit down with a toddler roaming? Yea...it's not happening. I wipe butts all day, feed, clean, read, play, prepare dinner. That's what I do.

2. What do you do for a living? Every time I answer this I see the look of surprise spread across people's face. One night while celebrating some friends birthday one of the women (about to be a Doctor may I add) ask "What do you do?" I took a moment then answered "I am a stay at home father and volunteer pastor." I said with confidence and a smile. "That's so wholesome." was the response. I am always amused with how people respond to my vocation.

3. How long do you plan on doing this? As if I am lazy for being a stay at home dad. In fact I've come across a lot of people who think this. I will do this as long as it fits our need as a family. So in short. I don't know.

4. Is this what you want to do? YES and no. Yes I love serving my family. I love dancing with my daughter, snuggling, and making Edyn laugh. I HATE grocery shopping though. Worst scavenger hunt ever. No, this is not what I want to do in life but this is where I am NEEDED in life.

5. Is it fun or hard for a man to do this? BOTH. There isn't a day that I don't laugh. EVER. But there are days where I want to throw my hands in the air and yell in frustration because there is poop on my hand...again. I love what I do and I am good at it =)

It's not popular for a man to do what I am doing but it is what my family needs in this season of life. I look forward to sharing with you in this journey as we move forward.